My friend across the pond is having a little trouble with the ladies. I have similar problems, though I wouldn’t necessarily compare myself to a snake. More like a cheetah – going for days without eating, saving up energy, before charging at a pack of gazelles and picking off one of the younger, weaker ones.
Last week I approached a girl in a bar who (surprisingly) had been giving me the eye for a while. When greeted with the words, “Oh, my god you’ve got an accent. You’re coming with me,” I could have been forgiven for thinking that this was a sure thing, a lock if you will. It would have been, I’m sure, if the conversation hadn’t somehow found its way around to next year’s presidential election. “Yeah,” she said, “I just hope the Republicans stay in power.”
Jeff Garlin’s (Curb Your Enthusiasm) words of, “I’d f*#k her with a Bush mask on” crossed my mind. But I couldn’t let it lie, “I don’t totally agree with that” I replied. And with those words the sprightly gazelle slipped through my paws and escaped back to the safety of her pack. Larry David would be proud.
Last week I approached a girl in a bar who (surprisingly) had been giving me the eye for a while. When greeted with the words, “Oh, my god you’ve got an accent. You’re coming with me,” I could have been forgiven for thinking that this was a sure thing, a lock if you will. It would have been, I’m sure, if the conversation hadn’t somehow found its way around to next year’s presidential election. “Yeah,” she said, “I just hope the Republicans stay in power.”
Jeff Garlin’s (Curb Your Enthusiasm) words of, “I’d f*#k her with a Bush mask on” crossed my mind. But I couldn’t let it lie, “I don’t totally agree with that” I replied. And with those words the sprightly gazelle slipped through my paws and escaped back to the safety of her pack. Larry David would be proud.
2 comments:
Ah, plenty more "guy walks into a bar" stories to come, I hope.
But dude, don't use 'ladies' as my hyperlink text. Surely, 'friend across the pond' would make for a better link. Have you any idea what this is going to do to my search engine optimisation?
Great line from Curb, by the way.
Actually I have no idea what it would do to your search engine optimisation. But I've changed it anyway.
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